With Dr. Juliana Hauser

Finding Sexual Sovereignty in Midlife: A Conversation with Dr. Juliana Hauser
Are you navigating the sometimes tumultuous waters of midlife transitions? Feeling disconnected from your desire or uncertain about your shifting identity? You're certainly not alone.

In our latest episode of the Find Your Feminine Fire Podcast, I had the incredible pleasure of speaking with Dr. Juliana Hauser, a world-renowned sexologist, TEDx speaker, and creator of the Revealed Holistic Sexuality curriculum. With over 20 years of experience helping people liberate themselves from shame and confidently own their sexual identity, Juliana brings profound insights to one of life's most transformative chapters.

Embracing the Metamorphosis of Midlife

"It's an overall metamorphosis in midlife, from head to toe. You are changing," Dr. Hauser explains. "I think we haven't completely embraced that this change can really be a beautiful change if you understand that it's coming and you can prepare for it."

What struck me most about our conversation was Juliana's emphasis on developing a "tolerance for ambiguity" during this time. Rather than fighting against the uncertainty of perimenopause, menopause, and other midlife transitions, she suggests learning to move forward without needing absolute certainty to feel emotionally safe.

This isn't easy! Our bodies are changing, our hormones are fluctuating, and sometimes we barely recognize ourselves. But as Juliana reminds us, having agency - knowing your terms and living them - can be your North Star through these changes.

A Personal Journey Through Medical Agency

One of the most powerful parts of our conversation was when Juliana shared her personal experience with having a hysterectomy last year. With remarkable candor, she described how she applied the principles of agency to this significant medical decision:

"I showed up for myself," she explained, describing how she prioritized her needs even when it felt uncomfortable or unfamiliar.

Juliana even filmed herself daily throughout the five-week preparation period, creating a video journal that later revealed themes she hadn't consciously recognized - like her exhaustion from constantly "pushing through" difficult experiences, a pattern many women maintain throughout their lives.

Redefining Sexuality in Midlife

Perhaps the most liberating aspect of our conversation centered around holistic sexuality. As Juliana emphasized, "Being a sexual person isn't about having sex. It's about knowing a deeper layer of yourself."

Her approach to sexuality encompasses nine pillars, with sexual acts being just one component. This expansive view gives us permission to explore what sexuality means for us now, not what it "should" look like based on past experiences or cultural expectations.

"I want you to wipe the slate clean," she advised. "There is no one way to be a sexual person. There's no one right way or normal way to have a sexual connection."

This perspective feels especially freeing during midlife when physical changes might require new approaches to pleasure and connection. Rather than seeing these changes as losses, we can view them as invitations to discover new aspects of our sexual selves.

Creating a New Culture of Communication

Juliana's passion for changing our sexual culture shines through in her call for more open communication. "Share and ask," she encourages. "Share how you're doing, share what's working for you... and ask the people in your life that are going through this too."

By normalizing conversations about menopause, sexual health, and pleasure, we not only support ourselves but create a more informed path for future generations. As Juliana pointed out, our generation has already made tremendous progress in talking about menstruation - now we're building a similar revolution around menopause and midlife sexuality.

"We're building the plane while it's taking off," she laughed, acknowledging that we're figuring things out while simultaneously experiencing them.

Her new book, "A New Position on Sex: A Guide to Greater Sexual Confidence, Pleasure, and Authenticity," offers a roadmap for this integration through the nine pillars of holistic sexuality, complete with personal stories, client examples, and practical exercises.

"Our sexuality is not a luxury, it's a necessity," she affirms. "And it's not about how much sex you're having. It's the quality, it's the purposefulness, and it's the reason why you show up to yourself and other people as a sexual person."

Join the Conversation

As we wrapped up our discussion, Juliana shared her dream of seeing book clubs form around her book, creating spaces for these vital conversations to flourish. "I think sharing our stories is really important," she said, "and sometimes we do a good job of sharing the hard parts of our life, but we don't do a great job sharing the good things."

I'm personally inspired to normalize both the challenges and the joys of midlife sexuality. What if we could openly celebrate our sensual nature and sexual experiences with the same ease we discuss other aspects of our lives?

This episode reminds us that midlife transitions, while sometimes challenging, offer unprecedented opportunities for authentic expression, pleasure, and embodied wisdom. Rather than a decline, this chapter can truly become one of our most sexually sovereign and expressed yet.

P.S. You can find Dr. Juliana's new book "A New Position on Sex" wherever books are sold, and connect with her at dr-juliana.com.

And check out my previous conversation with Dr. Juliana from March 2021 on The Power Of Sexual Agency.

My name is Amanda Testa, and I'm a Sex, Love, and Relationship Expert + Trauma Resolution Guide.

My goal is to support you to heal your relationship to your sexuality so you can eliminate shame and guilt, own your sexy confidence, feel like a Goddess/Goddex in your skin, and have the deeply connected relationships you desire.

My unique proven process, The Feminine Fire Method™ combines the latest in neuroscience and somatic healing with ancient practices to facilitate rapid and lasting transformation. 
I'm also a Mama to a spunky 12 year old,  Wife to my sexy hubs, and lover of outdoor adventure and live music. 


I believe deep in my soul is that sexuality is the missing key in personal growth and development. 

I believe your sexuality and sexual energy fuels your creativity, confidence, and power. It is a vital part of your holistic health and vitality.

When we own our sexual power our pleasure and creativity flourishes.  Our confidence and body image soars.

Our relationships deepen.

And when you can connect to that power in yourself, it’s life-changing.

If you’ve been thinking about it, maybe we should talk! Click to book a free call to see if we’re a fit.

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