Want to learn my #1 secret for bringing back your libido and sexual radiance?
This week I'm sharing about one of my favorite practices, and the Do's and Don'ts of a proper Jade Egg/ Yoni Egg practice. Tune in as I answer all your questions, and demystify this powerful sensual self care tool.
Complete transcript below.
In this episode you'll discover
This week I'm clearing up some of the misconceptions around using a Jade or Yoni Egg. Tune in as I share my personal story of how this practice was a game changer for my life. Maybe you have a Yoni Egg and aren't sure what to do with it. Maybe you have no clue what I'm talking about. Either way, this episode will leave you with all the knowledge you need to determine if this practice is right for you.
Want an egg of your own? Get one HERE.
Have an egg but not sure what to do with it? Want to have a heart to heart to figure out if this is right for you or want to learn more about this work? Schedule a free consult HERE.
Join in the discussion on this episode and more in my free Facebook Group, Find Your Feminine Fire HERE.
EPISODE 137: Demystifying The Jade Egg + Unlocking Your Sexual Potential
[Fun, Empowering Music]
Amanda Testa: Hello, and welcome to the Find Your Feminine Fire podcast. I am your host, Amanda Testa. I am a sex, love, and relationship coach, and in this podcast, my guests and I talk sex, love, and relationships, and everything that lights you up from the inside out. Welcome!
So welcome, welcome, and, today, we’re gonna be diving into all things Yoni Eggs, Jade Eggs, and get all your questions answered. I want to start just talking a little bit about the practice and kind of why I’m so passionate about it, and then I’m gonna dive into answering all your questions, and we’ll move through all of those.
So, as we get started, again, I’ll just invite you to gather anything you might need to make this more comfortable. I always like to tap in and ask what can I do right now to make whatever I’m doing 10% more pleasurable, 3% more enjoyable, whatever feels doable for you, right? So, again, for those of you that don't know me, I’m Amanda Testa, and I’m gonna dive in today just talking a little bit about this practice which is one of my favorite practices to really reclaim your libido, your sexual radiance, and to kinda bring back that aliveness and vitality within us.
I truly believe our sexual energy is this powerful secret elixir that we’ve never really been taught how to tap into. This practice really helps you be able to do that. I appreciate you for tuning in today, and if you're curious who this is for, just know it’s for if you are a woman-identified human who wants to feel more alive. Maybe you're just feeling depleted, and maybe COVID sucked the life out of you and you're just over being in the house all the time, and you're missing the normal things that light you up. I don't know. I know it gets so crazy with constant interruptions and all the natural disasters going on in the world. So all of that stuff is real, and it all can combine to really kill your libido and have zero desire or zero, you know, that oomph to do anything for it.
This practice, if you want to engage on it at any level, you don't even have to go all in. You can do little bits and pieces. Like I always say, what is one little step that you can do to move you in the direction of feeling better? Even if it’s the tiniest thing, right? Maybe getting a little extra sleep or drinking a little more water. Whatever it might be, and it’s not to add more to your to-do list. It’s to kind of make everything you do more of an experience of presence and connection, whether that be cleaning the toilet or making love or parenting or dealing with a meltdown, whatever it is.
What I often see with clients when they start with this practice is they just start to have this confidence and this deep connection to their body which I think there’s so much there. There are so many layers there, but it really can lead you to feel sexy confidence in and out of the bedroom, no matter where you are, feeling more love and pride for yourself when you look in the mirror, and feeling (like when you walk into the closet) versus it being an experience of, “Ugh,” it’s more of an experience of, “Hmm, how am I gonna adorn myself today, right - what does my body need today,” and feeling more connected in all the things you do, as I mentioned a minute ago.
It awakens that sexual potential. So you can have more energy and creativity in all of your life ‘cause this is where our creativity thrives. It’s in our sexual center. This is the area of birthing and bringing to life, whether that might be a human or an idea or whatever it is, right - whatever your creativity wants to express. It can also help bring that desire back so you actually want to have sex again, so you can rekindle your relationship as well.
People notice the energy. People will notice a change in you. So if this sounds like something that you're in for, then stay tuned as I talk a little bit more because what I find, too, about this information and this practice is that there are a lot of strategies out there, and this is just a tool, right? It’s not like a miracle worker. It’s a tool, when used properly, that can be a miracle worker, but just on its own, it can do some things, but you really need to learn how to properly use it for it to be effective.
I, personally, have perfected this process. I’ve been doing this practice for many, many years. I’ve spent over 800 hours getting certified and trained to teach this to others, and so, there’s a lot to it, and I’m living, breathing proof that it works. I know, for myself, when I first discovered this practice, it was at a time in my life when I was super disconnected, and I just remember one morning waking up and I just was so resentful the minute I woke up. Everything was making me irritated. This was pretty common for that time in my life. My daughter was just a small baby, and I felt like I did everything, and I just remember walking to the bathroom and tripping over toys and just like, “Ugh, I’m the only one that ever does anything around here.” Then, when I got to the bathroom, looking in the mirror and having zero connection with the woman looking back at me and thinking, “What the hell? This cannot be my life.”
I mean, I’m doing all these things, but I still don't know what’s wrong. I was working out. I was involved in my community, I didn't have postpartum, I was doing all the things, but I was still just so disconnected, and so, I made a little commitment to myself in that moment that I would follow the breadcrumbs, I would follow the breadcrumbs to help me feel better and to feel like myself again, and one of those breadcrumbs happened to be finding this course from my mentor, Layla Martin, and I was thinking, “Okay, this is really -- it sounds -- I have no idea what it’s about. It’s something about spicing things up in the bedroom,” and I was like, “Well, that truly can’t hurt,” so I signed up. I remember, at the time, I signed up being mortified. I was like, “Oh, my god. I hope no one knows I’m doing this. I didn't even want to tell my husband. I was just so embarrassed, but I just knew, all right, I’m gonna be open for whatever. What I have been doing isn't working, so I’m open for something new.”
I remember when I first started with the practice, I was like, well, this is really weird, and I don't even think it’s doing anything. Why in the world is this so embarrassing, but after a few months, I was like, “Oh, my gosh!” I felt like a different person. I had all this energy again. I felt so much better in my body and, literally, even now, I am ten pounds overweight because of COVID and I’m like, “Eh,” and instead of the judging or feeling disgust when I look at my body or grab a roll I’m like, “Yeah, this is a part of me, and it is juicy and delicious.” Ah, and that is such a miracle because I suffered through eating disorders for years and hated my body. I mean, I wanted to chop it off with a knife, and now I’m like, ah, I love all of it. Part of this process is creating that deep connection to yourself and amazement for what your body’s capable of. So there’s a lot to it. There’s a lot to it.
I know so many women out there suffer, and you're told that losing your libido is just part of aging, right? You've just got to deal with it.
Use lube, whatever they say, right? I can tell you right now, that’s a bunch of BS because, honestly, a lot of healthcare providers aren’t really taught a lot about sexuality so they have, like, a very -- a few hours that they study it. And so, they don't always know what to say so they're like, “Use more lube. This is normal. Just deal with it,” and you don't have to. Know that if you have a lot of pelvic floor issues, this is another thing that’s not normal. Having painful sex is common, but it’s not normal. One in three women have painful sex in the last Masters and Johnson report I read. So it’s so common, but that doesn't mean it’s normal. There’s a lot of things that are common around our sexuality that aren't normal. Part of it is because we haven't been taught, and part of it is that there’s a lot of shame and disconnection around sexuality so we have never been really taught that this is something to be proud of and this is something to nurture and this is something that’s our life-force energy.
I’ll tell you a little bit about the history of the practice because people often ask, “Well, okay, what even is this?” Basically, this is a tool that was used in practices back -- kind of it started with The Taoists. Basically, it was talked about in The Yellow Emperor's Classic of Medicine (which is a Chinese medical text from 100 BC), and so, there’s supposedly these ancient Taoist roots to this practice. So that’s kind of a mystical and spiritual tradition from China that originated around 400 BC. You might be familiar with the Tao Te Ching, but it’s basically kind of a Chinese version of Tantra, and it really focuses on a seasonal approach to living and kind of this fundamental energy source of life. Like, we have a few different energy centers. Basically, we have Qi (which is energy), we have our Jing Qi (which is our sexual energy, and then Qi (which is our heart energy), and Shen (which is a spiritual energy), but with the Chinese medicine (if you're familiar at all), it’s a lot around health and healing and promoting harmony in the body.
When there’s disharmony, that’s when disease can come in. I’m not a healthcare provider. I’m not giving medical advice here. I’m just sharing a little bit of the philosophy. Through this practice, you can kind of bring in what’s good and get rid of what’s bad and get your body humming on all cylinders, so to speak, because the more that you have all your cylinders humming, the less disease. There’s less opportunity for things to kind of -- kinks in the system.
That’s kind of what’s so key about the Jade Egg practice. So you might have heard of it called a Jade Egg or a Yoni Egg, and yoni is the Sanskrit turn for your vagina which I really prefer the term pussy which I know turns some people off, but because there’s not really a great word to encompass all of it -- the vulva is your external genitalia. The vagina is the internal canal, and so, Yoni is more like a sheath, but it’s like really reclaiming that part of your body in the word which sometimes takes some work, but if we can reclaim the word pussy and really feel good about it, then, I’m telling you, there is some power in that. We can also always read Mama Gena’s book with the same name, Pussy: A Reclamation, which is a powerful book if that word still rubs you the wrong way. [Laughs]
So that practice is about being tuned in with your body’s natural states, having a healthy pelvic floor because, again, in the Taoist philosophy, you are pumping energy from your pelvic floor (that’s where our sexual energy resides in our lower belly, our genitals, our whole pelvic bowl), and the stronger your pelvic floor is, the more healthy your pelvic floor is. You don't want it to be tight, but you want a nice, relaxed, toned pelvic floor that you can circulate that energy through your body more easily and use that to fuel your entire body. It also can help you get into expanded states of ecstasy and pleasure and expansion and really moving the things that need to go, getting the unaligned things out of the system.
Why is it different? Why is it different than other things out there? What I think about this that has something different that Kegels and pelvic floor physical therapy may lack is the emotional component that really empowers the sensual and sexual enlivenment, and while I do recommend pelvic floor therapy (I do think it’s great) and Kegels (when you do them properly) are great, there’s also a lot to learn about your pelvic floor.
Sometimes, this practice, you want to do it in different ways depending on what’s going on in your pelvic floor, right? If you have a super tight pelvic floor or if you have a vulvodynia or you have vaginismus (which is kind of an involuntary contraction of the muscles around the vaginal opening) then there’s different ways to use the practice, right? If you want to strengthen your pelvic floor, this is a great practice for that, but we have to learn the proper way to use it, right? You can’t just put it in and hope for a miracle. That's not how it works, and so, it’s much like yoga, right? There’s stretching and there’s yoga, and yoga is different than stretching because there’s that more psycho-emotional component to it and it has an intention for personal evolution and growth. In the same way, that’s how the Jade Egg practice works, right? It’s different from just simply squeezing. You do learn practices of how to do it in a way that serves your body. So there’s a lot of supports there. There’s physiological and biological supports, emotional and spiritual supports as well.
And so, I want to dive into a little bit of these because I think these are questions that come up a lot like how does it work, what does it even do? So I want to dive into that. If you have a serious health issue or problem, always work with a professional. If you're not sure what’s going on in your pelvic floor, there are some self-assessments that I can guide you through but, also, you can always go to a Pelvic Floor PT and get a check-in. I think this is a healthy thing to do if you've ever had kids and even if you don't because as we age, gravity pulls on our organs and what prolapse means -- you might have heard of vaginal prolapse or prolapse in general is when your organs kind of, like, come out of the pelvic floor and sag down. You don't want that to happen, right? So you need to have a healthy pelvic floor in general to eliminate that as well as to help heal all kinds of issues. If you typically have a lot of yeast infections or BV or things like that, when you kind of regulate your body, these things can, often, dissipate.
Healing after-birth wounding, healing after-birth trauma, that’s another thing that I see a lot of. This, again, isn't always really addressed on the emotional level, right? You can heal, physically, but there’s a lot that still can be going on emotionally and that needs to be processed and integrated that you might not even realize. A lot of times these things are subconscious and they show up in our sexuality that we might not even be aware of, right? So maybe there’s a shut down or pain or, of course, if you're having pain, you're not gonna want to have sex because your body is wired to move towards pleasure and away from pain. You're definitely not gonna want to do something that hurts, and if you do that repeatedly every time, you're gonna kinda have more numbness and more shut down, and that’s just normal, but there are things you can do to turn that around.
Also around vaginal atrophy and dryness with age, you’ve gotta (I like to say) use it and you won't lose it. So even just taking care of your vulva and your vagina and your pelvic floor should be part of your overall health and wellbeing, and it’s often something we don't think about unless we’re going to the gynecologist or have a problem, right?
This should be a part of our overall selfcare, in my opinion, because it’s a huge, vital part of the equation. Our sexual health is a real meter to our overall health. If things are going wrong in one area, it has a ripple effect in all areas of your life. So know that if this is coming up for you, there are things you can do because it’s got a more holistic approach, right? It works on a deeper level even if you think, “Well, I don't really have any problems,” it can just help unlock a lot of radiance and energy and just this deep connection with yourself because, for most women (for many women) there’s been a lot of shame around our sexual organs. Perhaps, you grew up in an environment, but, culturally, if you grew up in The US, especially, there’s a lot of shame around it. There’s not a lot of speaking of it. A lot of women aren’t even told the proper name for their anatomy.
Just a question here - raise your hand if, when you were little, you were taught what your vulva was and taught what your clitoris was and your anus and your vagina before you were, like, five or six years old -- when you were young? Not very many. I know it was like “down there” or “your tootie,” in my house. [Laughs] So that, in itself, can subconsciously create a disconnect. “There’s no word for this part of my body. It must be bad.” A lot of times it’s the culture we grew up in. Our parents didn't necessarily have the most open education around it. So I’m giving them some grace a little bit but also knowing it’s important to feel confidence in our anatomy, right?
The other thing that’s really exciting is there are a couple of teachers in this field that are actually doing a lot more medical studies, and, as many of you know, it takes a lot of years and a lot of money to get scientific research. So a lot of these claims may not have a lot of scientific backing yet, but there’s thousands and thousands of women who can speak to the benefit and so many clients that can speak to the benefit.
So some of the benefits that you can find are no feeling, healing prolapse, getting rid of incontinence. It’s a very common thing. As I mentioned before, things that are common might not be normal, but 26% of women experience some kind of urinary incontinence, and there are different types so, again, there are different exercises based on the type of incontinence you have. You don't want to necessarily over-tighten your pelvic floor. If it’s too tight, that can cause some problems. Again, if it’s too loose that can cause some problems. So there are things to be defined so that you know the proper way to use the practice.
Tension - a lot of things that happen is we hold so much in our sexual center. We hold so much tension. I have one of the -- oh, gosh, I forget the lady’s name. She was on my podcast once, and I loved it. She talked about how our pelvic bowl is kind of, like, under the sink where everything just gets shoved. “Ah, I can deal with that later. I’ll just put that under the sink. Oh, well, the neighbors are coming over, let’s just shove everything under the sink.”
And so, we have all this stuff held in our sexual center in our cells, and, you know, there’s so much study around how our body holds onto trauma in the cells of our body. So part of healing and integration is actually working with the tissue to integrate and release anything that needs to go. A lot of sexual issues can come from this, right? When you don't have a lot of health in your pelvic floor, there’s a lot of sexual dissatisfaction. Forty percent of women report sexual dissatisfaction, and forty-six percent of women have some kind of sexual dysfunction, and I don't love that term because I think a lot of it is just stuff we haven't learned.
The other benefits that people also ask me about -- there were some questions around sexual energy and what is that and what does it mean to move sexual energy, and so, I’m gonna address that as well.
So with regards to that, as I mentioned before, our sexual energy is our life-force energy. This is a center of creation, and no matter what age you are, no matter what’s going on in your life, this is a resource that you can tap into when you learn how to do it, and so, often women who want to engage in this practice are looking for better orgasms, they're looking for more of a spiritual experience like when you hear some of these leaving-your-body, annihilation orgasms, that is a big fear for a lot of women - having that level of surrender where you can just become one with the universe and really surrender to your experience. So part of the process is learning to be open to that ‘cause many women have trouble allowing that deep level of surrender or letting go or allowing themselves to get to that space where they can let go. So there are steps to that.
It can be an antidepressant when you have feel-good energy running in your system, and I know for myself, I can tell such a difference when I’m doing my practice regularly and when I’m not.
I can tell you right now, it’s like night and day. It’s just amazing, the difference, like, how much better I feel, how much more energy I have. The overall well-being of my system when I’m consistently doing a practice versus when I’m not -- and we all go through phases, right? It’s like working out, you know? If you fall off the wagon for a long time, you’re gonna notice. You're not gonna have the same energy level, and this practice works the same way. It can really help heal a lot of these issues of body hatred, guilt, shame, disgust with oneself, right, because you can release a lot of the stuff that’s keeping you disconnected from your sexuality or rejecting yourself on some level - your body, the way it looks. It’s really connecting to the authentic, original essence of you, like, this blueprint within that is full of health, that we all have access to, it’s just our culture or life experiences has dulled it or almost put it out, but it’s still there. There’s still this little feminine fire that’s like, “Nurture me, blow on me, expand me.”
I want that. It wants to thrive in us. Our health wants to move freely through our system. You know, there’s just so much healing that can come from that.
There is a researcher, William Wright, who has done a lot of studying on trauma and sexual energy, and he did a lot of research around finding the sexual conditioning and trauma that’s held inside of our system that keeps a lot of numbness or disassociation. So maybe you don't have a lot of sensation. Maybe you just don't feel much down in your sexual center at all, and that is normal too. So what we do with this process is kind of learning to open up and liberating stuck energy and working to rewire the brain in the process so that you learn to associate sexuality with desire and experiences - things that you desire like the experiences, the feelings that you want.
As I mentioned before, the trauma-healing aspect, this is a big thing with this practice, and so, if you have sexual trauma, there’s a lot that can come up. So I urge you, if you have that kind of history, you definitely want to work with a professional 'cause things can come up. As I mentioned, we’ve got so much in our systems, and when you can untap that, if you don't have the proper support, it can be overwhelming. This is just a gentle way. It’s a gentle practice to slowly integrate residual trauma, and there’s also deeper levels there. I know, for myself, I went to therapy for seven years for sexual trauma which helped so much, but also, this, I was amazed, in a few months, how much healing happened because I was actually working in the space where the trauma happened, right? I was healing it. Powerful, powerful, powerful.
Also, something I see a lot with women is that feeling of not-enoughness: “I’m not good enough,” or, “I’m not worthy. La, la, la,” which is all the patriarchal conditioning that we have from growing up in the structure that we have, right?
Know that’s normal too, and so, this kinda helps reconnect you to that part of you. I’ll share that one of my clients, Rachel, shares with doing this work, she experienced profound shifts in awakening and understanding her sexuality. She says, “I feel more connected to my body and more vibrant and alive. I understand the deep, unconscious patterning from my religious upbringing which has caused me to shut down my authentic sexual expression. Bringing compassion and awareness to this patterning has helped me reawaken my true self and my sexual desire. I am so grateful for our time together.“ So it’s powerful stuff. There are these deeper levels that you can access.
So I also want to share -- let me make sure I hit all the questions that you guys sent in ‘cause there were some really good ones. More Q&A.
Q: So how do you start and maintain a sustainable practice? Wearing mine overnight seems not to work well. I forget it’s in there, and when I get up, half asleep, to pee, it goes in the toilet. I’ve sort of given up on it.
A: So this cracks me up because I love all the stories of people dropping their egg in the toilet. Here’s what I say: I don't recommend, necessarily, sleeping in your Jade Egg because you don't just put it in and expect a miracle, right? There are specific practices that you use. So this is something I teach my clients: What is a sustainable practice? What are they? What does it look like? You don't want to just wear it around because, actually, that can be taxing on your pelvic floor. Although they're not heavy, our core -- all the muscles are connected. So if you have back issues or if you have core issues, all of that’s connected so you want to make sure you’re using it properly. So I don't recommend sleeping in it or wearing it around. Ideally, when you start the practice, you want to do 15- to 45-minute sessions with the egg in and then remove it. Again, the more you progress and you feel stronger, then you could maybe wear it around. That’s not something I recommend. Sleeping in it, again, that can be taxing on your pelvic floor so I don't recommend doing that.
Q: How often do you use it and for how long?
A: So this is the other thing. You can do just simple -- even if you did 15 minutes a couple times a week, you're gonna start to notice a difference, and one of the things I love about this is it gives kind of a physical representation to the commitment that you have to your sexuality. You know, I love to talk about sensual self-care as a sacred experience because, truly, that’s what it is. It’s a sacred honoring of your body, a sacred honoring of your pussy, a sacred honoring of all these parts that we’ve taught to be ashamed of, and, really, it’s for you. This is for you - an opportunity to fully bear yourself to yourself. This practice is only for you and you alone. That’s what I think is so powerful because when you can reclaim that for yourself, then it becomes easier to know what you like, then it becomes easier to express that to others, create the boundaries that you need so you can have time and space for your practice.
You know, one of the things that I know -- I’ve got a family, right? We’re all stuck in this house, and I don't even have locks on my doors, but I have a “do not disturb” sign I put on my door, and I’ve trained my family.
They know not to come in with it on. Occasionally, yes, there’s a door-knock. Occasionally, yes, there are some questions through the door, but they know not to come in, and, yes, there are times when this happens often, like, at the apex of a practice, someone is, like, knocking or needing something, but that’s part of the practice, too, is learning to kinda stay in your own energy even with distractions because that’s life. It’s really unrealistic that you’re gonna have all this time and space uninterrupted, and so, the more you can kind of create these pockets for yourself, the more your people are gonna realize, “Oh, wow, I see such a difference when you do the practice. Yes, take the time to do the your practice.” My husband is like, “Oh, my god, it’s night and day. Please, take all the time you need.”
Again, for that question, “What do you do with it? Do you just hold it in there? Are there exercises? What’s the deal?” There are exercises. You don't just hold it in there. There’s a process of learning to put it in, in a way that honors your body. So many times we’ve been taught just to say yes when our body means no, so you learn how to put it in, in a way that’s respectful and honoring and that you actually get a real yes from your body.
And so, there are exercises, and, really, the benefits of it being egg-shaped, I would say there are a few theories on that, and it’s around that creation piece, right? The egg, the creation, right? We come from an egg. It’s a big part of creation energy so that’s why I think it’s in the shape of an egg, and, also, it makes it easier to insert. When I first had my baby, I remember doing a lot of research on repairing my pelvic floor when I didn’t even find anything out about it (a Jade Egg), and, thankfully, there’s more information out there about them now, but I remember getting some Kegel weights, right? And so, super great things, but also very sterile, very institutionalized-feeling, very medical. Not sexual, not sensual, not sumptuous, and when I’m gonna be relating to my body, that’s the relationship I want.
I don't want some medical, “Okay, here’s this device. Do this. Do that.” That, to me, didn’t feel nourishing. Those things are great. I’m not dissing that. There is some importance for pelvic floor therapy, but in doing it in a way that feels delicious and more honoring is what I was looking for, and that’s what I found with this which I love, right? Yeah, yeah.
Let me see.
Q: So excited to give this practice a try as my glass dildo is collecting dust because it hurts.
A: Mm, I’m sorry to hear that, and, yes, you don't want to force anything that is painful. Oftentimes, I have so many stories of, like, “Oh, my egg sat on my shelf forever,” and it’s okay if it feels scary to use it because these practices are designed where you don’t have to even use the egg, you know? You can use it if you want. If your body says no, you can still do the practice without it.
Q: Does price/brand matter? Is jade the best option for beginners? Do I need to consider size?
A: So here’s what I recommend. I actually recommend jade because, traditionally, that’s what was used. There are all kinds of different eggs out there, and I would say as long as you are using a reputable source, that is great. I actually sell them, and I sell the medium size because I feel like that is kinda the best overall size for all. There’s a hold drilled here in the center because you can thread it with unwaxed floss. So that way it’s easy to remove. I do think jade is great. So a middle-sized Jade Egg is ideal, and you want to make sure that you get it from a reputable source because you want to make sure the jade is mined in an ethical way. So that’s why I use the company that I do because I trust where they come from.
Something else I will just advise as well is when you start the practice -- again, that’s the other reason why I offer a free consult when you purchase an egg because I feel like that’s a really important part of it -- is to make sure that you know what practices are appropriate for your body 'cause there are actually things that you can do that can be harmful.
So it’s really important to speak with a professional around how to use it. Also, if you maybe have an egg but aren't sure how to use it, then I’ll invite you to set up a call with me, and I’m happy to walk you through how you can do it and what are some exercises that are helpful. So I’ll put that here too. Amandatesta.com/purchasejadeegg is where you can get the egg. Amandatesta.com/purchasejadeegg, and that also comes with some beginner videos. So you’ll get your consult with me, and you’ll get that kind of walk through of how you use it and what you do. Then, if you do already have an egg, but you want to know how to use it or what’s right for your body, you can go to amandatesta.com/activate and schedule a time, and I can walk you through it and share some practices. I also have an online program around working with the Jade Egg, so I can answer any additional questions that you have, but I really love to kinda demystify this practice because there are so many questions, and there are so many falsehoods out there on the Google.
And so, know that it really is a practice that can be super supportive if you do it properly and there’s a reason why there’s a lot of years of study and understanding of your anatomy to be able to teach it because there are the right ways and the wrong ways to go about it.
Oh, the other question is:
Q: What do you do to keep it falling in the toilet?
A: This is why I usually remove it before I go to a toilet, and if you forget, it happens, but typically, you could always just put a little reminder when you're done with your practice to remove your egg, and if you do go to the bathroom and it falls in, you can get it out. [Laughs] Use a spoon or something. Put it in the dishwasher. Sterilize it. It’ll be okay.
Oh, yeah, that’s another question that I got. Before you use it for the first time, you definitely want to sterilize it.
So you can boil it in boiling water for ten minutes and, again, make sure it’s fully cooled before you use it. You don't want to burn your delicate tissue. But, yes, you want to always sterilize them before you first use them.
Q: How long before you start to notice a difference?
A: So that’s a good question. So, again, as I mentioned before, if you do 10 to 15 minutes at a time, then that’s a great way to start, right? Doing just a couple practices a week is an amazing shift because, not only are you committing to yourself, you know, there’s that intention. That has a lot of power of, all right, this is something that’s important to me, and I’m gonna make it a priority in my life again, and then the more you do it, over time, you start to develop more sense eight focus which means there’s more connection between the nerve endings in the brain so that there is more sensation. This is part of the reason this practice can be so helpful. It’s because you can start to connect those nerve endings and bring back more sensation.
So I would say, for me, I think after a few months I started to notice a difference; after six months, a huge difference; and now I can tell it’s night and day when I don't do it and when I do. You know, I can tend to have a lot more feelings of malaise and depression when I’m not consistently taking care of myself and doing my practice, and people also ask, often, what if I have an hour, and I want to work out, and I want to do all these things. Why would I do this versus working out? To that, also, that’s a good question, and the more you do the practices, you actually can do, like, a 15-minute. So, oftentimes, this is kind of what I offer when I work with clients is a lot of different practices, right? You can have an hour-long practice, you can have a ten-minute practice. You can have a fifteen-minute practice, and so, I also like to incorporate in kind of a workout and call it my pelvic inner-pussy energy power workout, and so, you can do 15 minutes of working out, like a HIIT workout -- 15 minutes, and then 15 minutes of pelvic floor work using your egg, and then 15 minutes of meditation or breath work.
That’s 45 minutes, and you're done, and you’ve hit all the buttons. You’ve gotten your body moving. You’ve gotten your sexual energy moving. You connected to yourself and your mind and your body and your spirit. That, to me, is my perfect workout.
So it differs for everyone, right? There are some days maybe you want to go run for two hours, right? There are some days maybe you want to go to the gym, but when you add this in, you're gonna realize, wow, it’s worth it to make time for this, and I really enjoy making time for this. So it becomes a priority once you see the effects. Yeah.
Q: Can you speak to circulate the energy or bringing to orgasm?
A: Ooh, yeah, that’s a great question. Thank you for bringing that up. Circulating sexual energy as opposed to expressing it through orgasm. So here’s one of the benefits of this, and this is kind of a more advanced practice. The more you work with the egg, you start to realize what your sexual energy feels like, and it can differ for everyone, and so, as you start to circulate it through your body, what that kind of means is, often, when we think of an orgasm, I hear it referred to as a genital sneeze, right?
It’s like you build up, you build up, [Sneeze Sound] and there’s, like, this expression or sensation that happens around the clitoris or in the vulva because actually the clitoris is more than just that little tip up there, right? It’s got these wings that go around the vulva so there’s a lot of erectile tissue there. And so, really, what you can learn when you start to expand your sexual energy is you build up the sensation, and then you start to move it through your body. So instead of just allowing it to collect in your genitals and, like, [Stop Sound] tense it out, you’re kind of expanding and inviting a more full-body experience of the sensation and of the pleasure. When you do that, it can help to expand your orgasms. So, again, instead of being like just a clenching type of thing, it’s expansive and it’s more full-bodied. So when people speak of full-bodied orgasms, that’s kind of how I describe that.
There are some theories in the Taoist philosophy, specifically, for a man around orgasming and when they ejaculate, and releasing energy versus containing it and spiraling it through. This is something you can play with because sometimes you might notice if you have a lot of orgasms, maybe it’s really rejuvenating to you. Maybe it feels exhausting and, in that case, you might want to just kind of circulate the energy versus letting it build and build and build and orgasming, you can just build it and then -- you know, one of the practices I teach is how to circulate it through your system. So it can be more of like a nourishment for your body, and you can use that to kind of just tune into where does my body need this energy, where does my body need this nourishment, and letting it go there. Yeah.
And so, people often ask the question around how is it a compliment to partnership. I have a question here.
Q: Sometimes when I do these self-pleasure practices, it may interfere with my sexual relationship with my partner. Will you use it up and not desire your partner?
A: What I say around that is actually what I’ve found is the more that I cultivate my aliveness and my sexual energy, the more I have desire in general. So it just kind of opens up this flow, and so, oftentimes, what happens is that you will have an increased level of desire because you’ve kind of opened up the flow, so to speak. So instead of going from zero to sixty, you're already running at, like, a thirty or a forty. And so, when an opportunity for sex comes up, there’s a lot more excitement and desire and lubrication because your body’s flowing and humming like it should. It usually helps to be able to connect to, okay, here’s what I like. I know now this is what I like. These are the touches I like. This is how I like to be turned on. Then, you can invite that into your partnership. So there’s actually more enjoyment.
Then, one of my clients, Claudia, was sharing around, “Every time we’ve done Jade Egg sessions the awkwardness and discomfort I’ve felt around my sexuality melts away, and I am able to surrender into deep states of pleasure within my body. Amanda holds a kind and compassionate and gentle space that always feels safe, completely loving, and non-judgmental. I would absolutely recommend Amanda to anyone who is interested in deepening their relationship to their sexuality and especially exploring the Jade Egg. I also noticed a deeper connection between myself and my partner in exploring our energies.” It definitely can help in your partnership as well.
Q: Is the practice more to feel pleasure than rather to climax?
A: Actually, it’s either/or, right? This is the thing I love. Once you kind of learn some basic practices, you can say, “Okay, what am I aiming for today? Okay, today, I want to really access my primal, wild nature,” right?
You can do that with the practice. Or, “Today, I just feel like I need some gentle nourishment. My body feels tired. I’m exhausted. I’m stressed out. I just feel so far away from anything that feels good,” and you could kind of just do a nourishing practice. Or you could be like, “Ah, I’m all about pleasure. I’m feeling so horny today, and I want to have some amazing orgasms,” then you can do a pleasure-focused practice. So that’s what I love about it is there are different ways. That’s what I teach - there are different ways to use it, and you can learn the different practices and know, “Okay, great, today, I’m going this way. Today, I’m going that way. Today, my body needs this,” and tune into what you need and offer it to yourself. Yeah, so if you want to have an orgasm during your practice, heck yes, and you don't have to, too. That’s the great thing. It’s kind of letting the goal off the table and just allowing your body to receive what it needs and to give yourself what you need, so that’s kind of a big part of the practice as well.
I’m curious if there is maybe one thing that you learned today that you want to take with you or maybe one thing you can appreciate about showing up today and even just to honor yourself for showing up and being open to learn because I know, like I said, when I started doing this, I was mortified.
I couldn't even go onto a call in the class because I was too afraid. [Laughs] I was too embarrassed, and so, that was something I worked through, but, no, that’s totally normal because I was like, “This seems weird. What even is this? You want me to put a rock in my vagina? This is so weird,” but then after learning the practice and really understanding the nuances of how it works I’m like, okay, there’s a reason this has been around for thousands of years -- I find science is starting to prove a lot of this ancient theory. So, yeah.
Ah, thank you all so much for being here, and I appreciate you taking the time to join. If you're interested in purchasing an egg, you can go to my website, amandatesta.com/purchasejadeegg and you can get one there. It comes with a call with me and practices as well so you can start your practice and know that you're doing it safely, as well as if you do have an egg and you want some more guidance, you can go to amandatesta.com/activate, and I can walk you through that as well.
I hope you all have a fabulous rest of your day. Stay tuned in the group. If you are in my group on Facebook (the Find Your Feminine Fire group), I am going to start offering more opportunities for practices there, so stay tuned as well.
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Thank you so much for listening to the Find Your Feminine Fire podcast. This is your host, Amanda Testa, and if you have felt a calling while listening to this podcast to take this work to a deeper level, this is your golden invitation. I invite you to reach out. You can contact me at amandatesta.com/activate, and we can have a heart-to-heart to discuss more about how this work can transform your life. You can also join us on Facebook in the Find Your Feminine Fire group, and if you’ve enjoyed this podcast, please share with your friends. Go to iTunes and give me a five-star rating and a rating and a raving review so I can connect with other amazing listeners like yourself.
Thank you so much for being a part of the community.
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